Saturday, March 19, 2005

Maybe it's the flu!

I'm sick. I know this isn't just a figment of my imagination. It started with a stuffy nose and a tickly-scratchy throat yesterday afternoon, and has progressed to mysterious body pains and vertigo hallucinations every time I move, and more mucus in my head than is attractive or called for. It's also brought on some moaning. I've been drinking fluids and sucking on C-and-zinc lozenges and watching Coal Miner's Daughter but nothing can stop the flu.

If I've got to feel this way, I'd better have contracted something famous. The flu is the A-list celebrity of late-winter, shitty-feeling viruses. I'd feel like an ass if this turned out to be whatever isn't the flu.

The summer before last, I didn't get West Nile. I was so disappointed. I did have something, but it was some lame-ass guest-star "Eastern viral encephalitis" crap. That just sounds disgusting, as though I'd been up to something gross. West Nile Virus was clearly the superior, zeitgeisty pathogen.

So, in closing, this had better be the flu. Or I'm going to be really put out. Oh, not at you, Barbara. Not at anyone in particular. Just at God.


Anonymous Barbara said...

If it was the flu darling, you'd not be able to post with such lucidity.

Sorry buttercup, I am sorry you aren't feeling well.

Love ya, babe. Keep up the good work.

Gotta run, take care.

6:05 AM  
Anonymous mojokitty said...

try some kimchi!

7:39 AM  
Blogger RelaxLove said...

hy·po·chon·dri·a ( P ) Pronunciation Key (hp-kndr-)
The persistent conviction that one is or is likely to become ill, often involving symptoms when illness is neither present nor likely, and persisting despite reassurance and medical evidence to the contrary. Also called hypochondriasis.
Plural of hypochondrium.

[Late Latin, abdomen, from Greek hupokhondria, pl. of hupokhondrion, abdomen (held to be the seat of melancholy), from neuter of hupokhondrios, under the cartilage of the breastbone : hupo-, hypo- + khondros, cartilage; see ghrendh- in Indo-European Roots.]

11:13 PM  
Blogger Lori Mocha said...

Drink some tea and sympathy.

10:08 AM  
Blogger sarahfisch said...

Relaxlove, what are you implying? I dare you to share a cup with me!!

5:29 PM  

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