Obligatory Post About What People Have Googled to Get Here

Margaret Dodge
chain mail
Shark punching
shark vs. zombie
Moneymaking Ideas
Dog frottage
paparazzo


Hello, friends!

Ms Parks

Rosa Parks's funeral should be grander and more important than Ronald Reagan's. And the new middle school in the school district in Texas I came up in should definitely be named after Rosa Parks over Barbara Bush. Rosa Parks would probably make a better Supreme Court Justice dead than Harriet Miers alive. She was more audacious than any Girl Gone Wild. I hope she amuses herself in the afterlife by haunting the wicked enemies of the people, but she's probably way too dignified for that.

Fisch's New Yorkers of the Day

That's me dear owd pal Jeff Mac: congratulations on winning Mr. Lower East Side, dude!* The women and gay men of below-14th like the cut of your jib, sir. You are my New Yorker of the Day. Although you are from Connecticut. Connecticut-HAHA! That's not a real place. Anyhow, Jeff, you did some mighty fancy "80's martial arts dancing," is what I would call it.
That's Jeff in his crown in that photo.**



Dang y'all, I wish this photo had turned out better. I was a little ambivalent about photographing somebody without his knowledge, here, but I did it anyway. Se the gentleman with the waist-length hair, ornate jacket, and black and white cotton leggings with the oversized houndstooth print? I love him, you see.

Here he is again. Can you tell which gentleman I mean?


No?
Well, anyhow, everybody loved him. People on the train other than I were loving him also, I'm pretty sure. He was totally rocking the Chuck Taylor hightops too. I felt it was important for y'all to see and appreciate him, Barbara, becuase he is my New Yorker of the Day Numero Dos.


*A satirical drunken all-dude non-beauty pageant conceived by Reverend Jen.Former Mr. Lower East Sides have been Jonny McGovern, Mike Amato, John Ennis, Neal Medlyn, Eric Kirchberger, and Moonshine Shorey.

**Photo by Tom Tenney

How Do Y'all Do That Thing, Y'all? How?

A question for the bloggers; I keep reading peeps' blog entries in which they mention the crazy Google searches that have landed readers at their site. My site meter dealie doesn't tell me this stuff, I don't think. How do I find out? I wanna know! Do I have to shell out money or something?

Advice appreciated.

Furthermore, in the interest of the information being interesting to me eventually, here are some potential reader-attracting, misleading catchphrases:

SAUCY TALES OF OKTOBERFEST
I GET ALL SCHADENFREUDE ABOUT MYSELF
BUSH DOESN'T CARE ABOUT THE HUNGRY HUNGRY HIPPOS
YOU ARE VERY, VERY SUPERCALLIFRAGILISTICEXPYALIDOCIOUS
I SAID BIGFOOT!

Edited to add: So I learned how to look it up. It doesn't appear as though I am attracting much of ANYONE, really. DANG.

Overheard On America's Next Top Model

"I'm gonna go home to Texas, get some hair extensions, and hopefully you'll see me next as Miss USA."

Yes, I feel that way too, sometimes. Only, I'd go for Miss America. Fuck that low-rent Miss USA pageant track.
(Happy now, Nubree?)

Jay Oh Be

I'M BUSY! SOOOO BUSY! Readjusting to a 9 to 5 schedule has preoccupied me mightily here lately. And in addition to the new job, I also have two writing groups going (one a writerly writer's group, the other one involving writing, subterfuge and dioramas, to be described more later), plus I majorly hurt my ass bone (no kidding)recently which is oppressing me motivation-wise.

Furthermore, I just had a baby.

Just kidding!
I didn't just have a baby. I just stole a baby. It was sitting unattended in a stroller on the L train on Friday morning. I don't know what kind of baby it is. Kind of pinkish, very loud, somewhat moist. And ticking. Is that normal?

Anyhow, Happy Late New Year everybody!